It’s a new year! February is around the corner and for some people, that may come with expectations. Perhaps some families want to celebrate Valentine’s Day with their kids and have a nice dinner at home. But there may be others who look forward to having an intimate dinner date with their spouse. There can be many challenges to finding time with one another when parents have busy schedules, have kids to care for at home, or have other obstacles to overcome such as finances. Here are a few ideas on how to get more date time in when you are growing your family or have young kids to care for:
1. Make dating a priority.
Schedule a weekly or bimonthly time on your calendar to connect without the kids around. This is important for so many reasons. Connection and quality time are one of the most important aspects of a happy and fulfilling marriage. It’s also important to make time with your spouse a top priority. Modeling this for your children is good for them because it helps them to learn how to have a healthy romantic relationship in the future, and putting your marriage first creates a safe environment for them to have a happy and healthy childhood.
2. If finances, coupled with childcare expenses, pose a challenge to dining out, there are many creative ways to approach this dating concept.
You don’t have to leave the house to spend quality time with one another. Put the kids down for bed and then spend an hour or two having a deep conversation, make a special dinner together, or play a fun game at home. If the kids are a bit older, you can put an age-appropriate movie on for them and let them know that they should not bother you unless there’s an important issue that needs to be addressed. You can be in another room nearby and keep an eye on the kids. Another way to be able to go out and enjoy an evening with your spouse is to swap dates with another couple. Take turns watching each other’s kids. Other ideas are if you cut hair or can do some pet sitting, trade that for childcare. If you don’t have family around to help with childcare, perhaps there’s an elderly couple you trust that may appreciate having some “adopted” grandchildren around to watch and be part of their lives. It never hurts to ask around!
Enhance your marriage or partnership in the coming year by prioritizing your spouse and relationship, especially for those valuing quality time. Financial constraints shouldn’t hinder dating; be inventive in prioritizing connection. For inquiries, contact us at CCPC. See Brigette Elgie’s specialties below.
Brigette Elgie has been a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist for almost 20 years. She has practiced in many types of community centers and organizations including private practice. She has four kids of her own and has been parenting for 30 years! She’s an expert in childhood behavior disorders, play therapy, and parenting. See her bio for more information on her specialties and insurance. For the first time in four years, she has immediate openings.